Feel Your Own Unique Way, Create Your Own Path, Bricolage The Best Way Forward For You and in All Ways Listen To and Trust Your Inner Self Knowledge
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| ethical core values + authentic base + strong roots + wise aligned choices = A Life Worth Living |
by Vienna Pharaon
"I remember many many years ago when a friend of mine had gone through a break up, her then ex had moved states, and they then got back together and married. I’m oversimplifying it, but you get it. I remember my partner at the time moving states, us breaking up, and being in the pain. I reached out to her to get all the info on how she and her partner made their way back to one another. I wanted to know all of the details, all of everything so that I had a chance at the same outcome.It didn’t happen.
That was not my path. It wasn’t my work. It wasn’t my healing journey, my expansion, my transformation. I tried hopping on her path and it didn’t get me anywhere. This is important.
I see this all of the time. We’re fed “answers and solutions” that are just gimmicks. We’re sold books, courses, articles, and products designed to make us believe that if we follow 10 steps we WILL get the guy...or some version of that. [Dont get me wrong: there are incredible books, courses, articles, and products out there that are grounded and opening.] Pop-media relationship advice can be dangerous. How someone else finds their way may have absolutely nothing to do with your way. And if you don’t have that filter and some context you may just find yourself living out someone else’s healing path instead of your own.
What to do?
Be aware. Pay close attention to your own story. Don’t outsource your healing. Become an observer of yourself, your family system, and your experiences. Question, confront, and get curious about all of your parts. Observe your patterns and reactivity. Notice the stories you tell yourself. Notice your judgments. Notice your defensiveness. Begin to identify what it is you need to heal.
Yes, people can absolutely assist in that process. Others can shed light, ask powerful questions for us to explore, and offer a new lens on many things. People who are not us CAN absolutely open our eyes, but they can not earn our healing, transformation, and awakening for us.
Just a gentle reminder to go within and make sure you are on your path and not someone else’s."
That was not my path. It wasn’t my work. It wasn’t my healing journey, my expansion, my transformation. I tried hopping on her path and it didn’t get me anywhere. This is important.
I see this all of the time. We’re fed “answers and solutions” that are just gimmicks. We’re sold books, courses, articles, and products designed to make us believe that if we follow 10 steps we WILL get the guy...or some version of that. [Dont get me wrong: there are incredible books, courses, articles, and products out there that are grounded and opening.] Pop-media relationship advice can be dangerous. How someone else finds their way may have absolutely nothing to do with your way. And if you don’t have that filter and some context you may just find yourself living out someone else’s healing path instead of your own.
What to do?
Be aware. Pay close attention to your own story. Don’t outsource your healing. Become an observer of yourself, your family system, and your experiences. Question, confront, and get curious about all of your parts. Observe your patterns and reactivity. Notice the stories you tell yourself. Notice your judgments. Notice your defensiveness. Begin to identify what it is you need to heal.
Yes, people can absolutely assist in that process. Others can shed light, ask powerful questions for us to explore, and offer a new lens on many things. People who are not us CAN absolutely open our eyes, but they can not earn our healing, transformation, and awakening for us.
Just a gentle reminder to go within and make sure you are on your path and not someone else’s."
By Vienna Pharaon
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